In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
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She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
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On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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