so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
