Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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