I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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