I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Randomize
