if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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