yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
