First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize