This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
