with your own penis?
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
