And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
