it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
