My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
