just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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