As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
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It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize