Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
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you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
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I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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