My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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