I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
