Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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