ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
