Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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