her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
