oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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