I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
How external is "for external use only"?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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