she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
