who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
