are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
