so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
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