Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol http://tfl.nu/lm4w
  Replies (8) Good night (2576) Bad night (888)
• Favorite

  (1-917): View more from New York City

  you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...

  (917): View more from New York City

  oh thats it?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (1-917): you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around... (917): oh thats it? http://tfl.nu/beq9
  Replies (7) Good night (4694) Bad night (656)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70 http://tfl.nu/w9g2
  Replies (13) Good night (6325) Bad night (1157)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  my cup is half full, half full of rum.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): my cup is half full, half full of rum. http://tfl.nu/ajky
  Replies (11) Good night (5458) Bad night (962)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first http://tfl.nu/owtg
  Replies (24) Good night (6449) Bad night (1368)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step. http://tfl.nu/6g1i
  Replies (16) Good night (6569) Bad night (1094)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?

  (1-386): View more from Florida

  Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (386): You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...? (1-386): Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge. http://tfl.nu/modl
  Replies (31) Good night (2845) Bad night (5550)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.

  (254): View more from Texas

  Tornado warnings are fun!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (254): Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows. (254): Tornado warnings are fun! http://tfl.nu/9sqb
  Replies (13) Good night (3401) Bad night (1166)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage. http://tfl.nu/2oqv
  Replies (1) Good night (2282) Bad night (867)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out http://tfl.nu/lg4i
  Replies (7) Good night (2253) Bad night (851)
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  He smells so good today

  (1-641): View more from Iowa

  Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (641): He smells so good today (1-641): Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit. http://tfl.nu/5jte
  Replies (13) Good night (2233) Bad night (813)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  We still on for coffee?

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): We still on for coffee? (410): Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45. http://tfl.nu/m7ui
  Replies (5) Good night (689) Bad night (1295)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut" http://tfl.nu/oeuu
  Replies (3) Good night (1262) Bad night (530)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up http://tfl.nu/s6ka
  Replies (4) Good night (1294) Bad night (407)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason http://tfl.nu/3zx2
  Replies (4) Good night (495) Bad night (778)

Randomize