oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
i just google imaged poop.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
