So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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