So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.