We're facebook friends in real life
I wish I could teleport
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp