I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Green mimosas i think yes
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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