Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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