xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
