I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
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