How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
