I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Randomize
