sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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