You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
