We won't sleep together?
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
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