don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
