I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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