I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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