Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
