It's Friday. Sex?
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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