so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
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If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
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And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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