was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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