I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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