I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
