I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
They took my balls.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
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