thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize